The PREGNANT TURKEY:
One year at Thanksgiving, a woman was invited to her daughters house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible the daughter is, the woman decides to play a trick on her. She tells her daughter that she needed something from the store.
When the daughter left, the woman took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.
When it was time for dinner, the daughter pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird. With a look of total shock on her face, the mother exclaimed: “You’ve cooked a pregnant bird!” At the reality of this horrifying news, the daughter started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs!
One year at Thanksgiving, a woman was invited to her daughters house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible the daughter is, the woman decides to play a trick on her. She tells her daughter that she needed something from the store.
When the daughter left, the woman took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.
When it was time for dinner, the daughter pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird. With a look of total shock on her face, the mother exclaimed: “You’ve cooked a pregnant bird!” At the reality of this horrifying news, the daughter started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs!
Fact or Fable? I don't know, but I would have liked to have been there for that one.
Here's more Thanksgiving fun:
The turkey shot out of the oven
The turkey shot out of the oven
And rocketed into the air,
It knocked every plate off the table
And partly demolished a chair.
It ricocheted into a corner
And burst with a deafening boom,
Then splattered all over the kitchen,
Completely obscuring the room.
It stuck to the walls and the windows,
It totally coated the floor,
There was turkey attached to the ceiling,
Where there'd never been turkey before.
It blanketed every appliance,
It smeared every saucer and bowl,
There wasn't a way I could stop it,
That turkey was out of control.
I scraped and I scrubbed with displeasure,
And thought with chagrin as I mopped,
That I'd never again stuff a turkey
With popcorn that hadn't been popped.
A couple more jokes:
Q. Why do turkeys go gobble, gobble?
A. Because they never learned table manners.
Q. What happened to the turkey that got in a fight?
A. He got the stuffing knocked out of him.
The Parrot
A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary. Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."
John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued,
"May I ask what the turkey did?"
